Thursday, November 17, 2011

Woodgrain Box

With heavy heart I note that my erstwhile friend and co-designer, Brad of Crushing Skulls, has released pages from his “perfect” retro-clone game, Bludgeons & Flagons aka the Woodgrain Box, a project we have been working on diligently for upwards of half a week.

Why the sadness?

While my nom de guerre and artwork grace the pages of that "game", a wholesale and ruthless attempt by that jackass has usurped that great and open-ended enterprise developed in my mother's basement.

Do not be fooled, Gentile Reader.

You will note the heavy hand of his soul-crushing, anti-OD&D agenda—and the fact that he has released this game without my permission and explicitly stated that he will drop my credit and all royalties in future editions, merely adds to the scurrilous nature of this so-called “game.”

Please stay tuned for the release of Adventures in Firetrucks--a true roleplaying experience not to be missed, one that reflects the fun and creative energy of the original Ebonheath campaign.

15 comments:

  1. Upwards of half a week. Hahahahaha. Good stuff.

    Thanks for that.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Why do you think this is a joke?

    ReplyDelete
  3. (following trail of bread crumbs)
    hahahahaha

    ADVANCED DAMNIT!

    I WANT MINE IN ADVANCED!

    WHAT KIND OF SLACK OPERATION IS THIS???

    DO I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING MYSELF???

    ReplyDelete
  4. Released without your permission..? As I am the sole author of this book, I have no idea why I'd require your "permission". Yes, you threw out a couple ideas, but quite frankly they were without worth.

    Also, I own all rights to Adventures in Firetrucks so please refrain from using that ever again unless you welcome litigation.

    ReplyDelete
  5. As a gentile who reads, I am up in arms over this fragrant double-crossing. Still, it looks like he's the one with the art. I don't know how your counter-release can succeed against that advantage, but best of luck. I knew the OSR blogosphere could be contentious, but had no idea that it would get to the Do-it-to-them-before-they-can-do-it-for-themselves level of regression. Harsh.

    ReplyDelete
  6. The art is certainly a step up from the originals.

    ReplyDelete
  7. This is poorly executed garbage. System matters!

    DO I HAVE TO HOUSERULE EVERYTHING?

    Next, you're going to tell me that my miniature firetrucks aren't part of the 'real game'...

    We need a second edition... fast!

    ReplyDelete
  8. My lawyer has informed me that I must clarify something:

    Chris and I have joint ownership of Woodgrain Box (tm). I am sole owner of BLUDGEONS & FLAGONS (tm), thus the inclusion of his name anywhere in the published text is purely out of respect.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I hear WotC's legal department is examining the art for copyright infringement....

    ReplyDelete
  10. @Scottsz
    Preposterous, as much as I detest what self-styled Brad has done with "his" game, clearly the art is wholly original. Where, where in their IP have you seen stick penises drawn with such flair?

    @Self-styled Brad
    FYI, the BRAD of Coot is really you.

    And I think a court of law will be saying who in fact owns what and for why.

    ReplyDelete
  11. It's a scandal... I heard there are recordings of secret wiretapped conversations...

    It's Box-gate!

    ReplyDelete
  12. You were the first, man! Don't give up! I remember those first few games in your basement, or at least the memory of talking to somebody who heard you had a game.

    ReplyDelete
  13. After reading your post and researching the issues, I'm convinced you have a valid legal claim with a high probability of success. As soon as I receive your retainer, I will be happy to start work on your case.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I feel like I may have read this somewhere before.

    ReplyDelete
  15. DesertScribe, your advertisement of legal services was no doubt not cleared with your state bar association, so I'm reporting you.

    ReplyDelete